If I Had But One More Tomorrow

If I had but one more tomorrow, I'd write you a letter to let you know how much you mean to me. I would relive all the many things that we have done and gone through together. I'd tell you how I felt the first time I saw your face, kissed your cheek, and how your breath tickled my neck, giving me goosebumps. I would also tell you how much I wanted out of life for you, not for me. I had more than what I needed out of life because I had you! Thank you for the time we spent connecting and growing together.

If I had but one more tomorrow, I'd ask God to forgive me all the things that I failed to do. I feel I need forgiveness more for these, than all the things that He knows I feel sorry about. He knows why I did these, more than I do. But, I want to thank Him for the opportunity to have experienced this marvelous, complex world He has created.

If I had but one more tomorrow, I would look more at the details that are so much a part of this life: the color of a morning sky, the strength of the wind, the smell of so many foods, the taste of falling rain, and the warmth of a hug. These and so many more.

If I had but one more tomorrow, I would look forward to all the many things that are yet unfinished. Not so much for the fact that they are things, but because I have time to do them. And the time to remember, to reflect on past successes and disappointments, too. Memory is a wonderful thing. If I had but one more tomorrow, I'd plant more flowers, sing more songs, and spend more time with you. To feel the softness of the blankets around us as we snuggle for five more minutes, trying to ignore the outside world.

If I had but one more tomorrow, I'd want you to know that I really want you to go on without me. I want to be remember the way I was, and not some fantasy of what I was not. Remember the stubbornness that helped me get through so many difficult times. Remember my impatience and temper, too, when I wanted more for you than you wanted for yourself. I was afraid you knew that I couldn't always control everything.

If I had but one more tomorrow... but my time may be up. I find comfort in knowing that all my tomorrows will be lived out through you, the one who I have cherished and dedicated my life to, the one who will take my love and spread it upon all those you touch in your tomorrows.

Live all your today's as though there are no tomorrows. Tomorrows are on loan to us. Enjoy today as I have enjoyed you.

© Kathie Mueller

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